Tuesday, December 9, 2014

I've Lost My Appetite

Jay: Look, Jayne has lice.

Lindsay, picking a piece of dirt off of Jayne's head: Have you ever even had lice before?

Jay: No, I'm not a dirty heathen.

Lindsay: Just what are you trying to say? I had lice at least three times.

Jay: Gross. How is that even possible?

Lindsay: I wore another girl's sweater once. Not sure about the other times. Have you ever had scabies?

Jay: No. But I have had giardia and a tapeworm and athlete's foot and ringworm.

Lindsay: You have NOT had a tapeworm.

Jay: Well, they found tapeworm feces, so I assume that means I had a tapeworm.

Lindsay, revolted: Eeeew.

Jay, musing: Actually, it was tapeworm larvae in MY feces.

Lindsay, putting down fork: We have GOT to start filtering our dinner conversation topics.